Mother’s Day can be a let down, but it doesn’t have to be if you switch the focus and the purpose of the day. In an article from PopSugar by Lauren St. George during the Mother’s Day ramp-up, she says, “Nothing makes me feel quite so inadequate as a mother than the baby book.”
That quote really made me think about what Mother’s Day should be about.
How many of us, in the dark recesses of our soul, feel like an inadequate mom?
How many of us feel like our mother-worth is being tallied up somewhere?
How many of us long for the stamp of approval that we are doing a good job?
So many moms feel like Mother’s Day is the day when we’ll finally be acknowledged for being selfless, for doing everything, for everybody. But shouldn’t Mother’s Day be about something deeper?
“Few holidays succeed in disappointing mothers and striking terror into the hearts of fathers on an annual basis more than Mother’s Day. The holiday—which once served as a simple way to honor mothers—now conjures up images of crowded brunches, breakfast in bed, and sappy Hallmark Cards.” Nicole Russell,
It seems like Mother’s Day has become a day when all children are mandated to show love.
I think the big question is, do the gifts, cards, brunch, and flowers that are showered upon you on that special day really sustain you during the rest of the year when you’re facing chaos, drama and frustration? I don’t think so.
No mother wants to feel like her worth is determined by her parenting, yet deep down we judge ourselves. Deep down we’re keeping score about how we rank as a mother—our mother-worth.
I’d like to suggest a way to truly feel how valuable you are, how valuable your “mother worth” is. A way to feel fully acknowledged, truly seen, a feeling you can access any time of year, and it doesn’t cost a dime.
I believe you’ll find what your soul is longing for this Mother’s Day in the connection you have to your child.
I know that dads have deep connection to their child as well. But since it’s Mother’s Day, I am speaking about moms.
You know the connection I am speaking about.
I am talking about that primal connection that transcends boundaries, where you can’t feel where you end and your child begins.
I’m talking about the connection you feel that flows between mother and child as if it were a tangible object.
That’s the connection that acknowledges who you truly are as a mother—your mother-worth.
That connection holds no judgement or assessments about your mothering.
That connection is about one thing, and one thing only—love.
And that connection can be accessed anytime or anywhere.
When you take a moment to connect with your child, regardless of age, and feel the love they have for you reflected back towards you, you feel an unspoken acknowledgment of your mother-worth. You feel the amazing benefits of oxytocin, the love hormone. You feel empowered, whole, happy, and less stressed and who doesn’t want that for Mother’s Day?
So, take a moment, any time of year, to move into your child’s world and connect. Fall into the now, and relax into that suspended timeless moment. Go ahead and just soak up the love between you. I’m betting those feelings will last a whole lot longer than the sentiments of a Mother’s Day card or breakfast in bed, even though we love those things too!
Oh and by the way, connecting into love is actually the true definition of devotion.
Now go hug your kids and Happy Mother’s Day.